*Credit: This beautiful photo belongs to RedzaRidzuan
So! We have booked our Kadi! We didn’t really have a particular Kadi that we wanted but initially, there is one Kadi that I found interesting. I saw a video of him officiating the solemnization of another couple and I like the way he does it. For example, I find the way he places his hand on the back of the groom to be reassuring. However, after witnessing him officiate a relative’s wedding, I had second thoughts and the fiancé admitted that he wouldn’t be comfortable either.
The reasons are nothing bad, really. Mainly, the Kadi was very outspoken and I felt that this could rub people in attendance the wrong way like it did at the wedding I was at. Also, the whole ceremony was very lengthy. The fiancé and I agreed that the Kadi could have done without some parts. Because the most important part in a nikah is when the groom says, “Aku terima nikahnya…” and this should be the main focus.
Again, I have to emphasize that there is nothing wrong with the Kadi. Some may find the Kadi entertaining, some may not. It all boils down to your preference and we prefer something simple, fast and quiet that adheres to the religious requirements in a Muslim’s solemnization.
The alternative was to book the highly sought-after Ustaz Salim Jasman; one who is very popular among the older generation. I’ve heard many good comments about how efficient and quick he is and I witnessed it for myself at my cousin’s wedding earlier this year. He came, he spoke and before you know it, it was all over!
You can book your Kadi 150 days to the wedding. Unfortunately, we didn’t and by the time we logged onto ROMM website a week later, Ustaz Salim Jasman was fully booked for the 22nd. Truth be told, we don’t really know much about the Kadis in Singapore, so I left it to the fiancé to decide. He did some research; he googled and read some reviews of the Kadis. I am actually surprised that such reviews are available online!
One tip that you will see on the ROMM website is that you should try to book a Kadi that resides nearby to the solemnization venue. This is for obvious reasons of course. You wouldn’t want crazy traffic to mess up your schedule. The location of the Kadi and some good reviews helped us decide on our Kadi.
So who’s our Kadi?
He is Ustaz Syakir Pasuni who coincidentally is the brother of my colleague and son of Kadi Ustaz Pasuni Daulan. Small world ey!
Here’s a wedding video of him officiating a couple’s wedding that I saw in a post by Kahwin Khronicles. You can forward to 01:11 – 01:19 to see the solemnization in action.
*Credit: This video was filmed by Diziq Vidz motion pictures
I love watching solemnization videos and I like the feeling I get when I hear the three all-important, life-changing and magical words being pronounced. Ahh! I also thought Kadi Syakir Pasuni sounded very professional, serious and firm in his officiating. Something I want at my nikah. 🙂
While doing the online registration, we got a little confused and we met with a snag halfway through the form which caused us to have to redo the entire application!
The Malay Language has never been my strong point. I can speak okay (no bahasa baku tho!) but I cannot write a formal letter for nuts. This, I have experienced before. I ended an email to a local Malay newspaper with a signing off in English (“I look forward to your reply!”)!
So we were at the Wakil and Wali section and I was like, “Wait, the Wali is my dad right? The wakil is the witness so, they should be our uncles?” What’s the difference between a Wakil and Wali? I know there’s a difference but their roles in the solemnization are so similar that we got confused! The fiancé called his mum while I called mine who was across the causeway to check.
So, the Wali is the bride’s biological father. He could also be her brother, paternal grandfather/uncle or any male relatives from her paternal side. He plays a pivotal role as he must give his consent to the marriage. On the other hand, the Wakil acts as a witness whom needs to be present during the solemnization. There must be one for the groom and one for the bride.
With our confusions dispelled and some other nitty-gritty information confirmed, we successfully completed our booking! TADAAA!
I think we panicked quite a bit during the whole process with missing details and stuff. But it all well pretty well in the end! Before I log off, here are some tips I gathered based on my experience and who knows, they might be helpful to you? 🙂
1. Read the ROMM’s website!
Read everything there is to know under Marriage Process at a Glance. Trust me, it helps and you might even be surprised with what you can learn from it. For example, let me ask you: what is the purpose of the duit hantaran? Check if your answer is right!
2. Decide on who you want as your Kadi
If you already know who you want and wish to avoid disappointment, you should submit your application on ROMM’s website exactly 150 days before your wedding to secure your Kadi. The listing of Kadi and Naib Kadi can be found here. Remember that it is advisable to book Kadi staying near your solemnization venue!
3. Decide who will be your Wakils
Have both your Wakil information ready – Full name & NRIC number.
4. Confirm your Solemnization timing
You will have to enter the time of nikah in the application, so be sure to discuss this beforehand and ensure your family agree on this with the in-laws. It would be good to have a backup timing in case your preferred timing is full!
5. Know what you want for your Mas Khawin
Mas Khawin, also known as Mahar, can be in the form of cash or gifts. You will need to indicate what exactly you want in the application form.
6. Check your application before submitting
Make sure the information you provided is accurate. Any changes to solemnization details will incur a fee.
Hope this entry is useful for anyone who’s about to book their Kadi. Now that we’ve booked our Kadi, time to fix a day with the Father to go to ROMM for the interview!
So many things yet so little time! Adoi, pening! Literally having a headache now!